‘Our hearts just sank’: Alberta family learns of son’s death in Victoria through Google search
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After not being able to reach his son Scott to wish him a happy birthday, Glen Grier began searching for his name on the internet along with Victoria, BC. The second hit was Scott’s obituary
Scott Grier died in Victoria on 16 May 2022. Photo by VIA AFFORDABLE CREMATION & FUNERAL
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Glen Grier says it would have been hard enough to find out about his son’s death 10 months ago from Victoria Police or the BC Coroners Service.
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Instead last week the father from Stony Plain, Alta. from a Google search he learned that his 35-year-old son Scott had died without his knowledge, burned and buried in a Victoria cemetery.
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“I’m not sure how to explain it. It was a wild and difficult time,” Grier said on Friday. “Don’t bother researching it to make sure what you saw on Google is true. It makes it that much harder when you spend a whole day figuring it out and making one call after another.”
On January 18, Grier and his wife, Michelle Grier, tried to reach Scott to wish him a happy birthday. Scott had struggled with his addiction for four or five years. He was last seen in the fall of 2019 when his father put him on a bus from Calgary to a healing center in Sicamous. But Scott got quiet in the third week, he left the center and went to Victoria.
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“He was always in touch. He might go a month or two, maybe twice a month, but he always found a way to say, “Hello. I’m good,” Grier said.
In September 2020, after not hearing from Scott for some time, Grier filed a missing persons report with Victoria Police. Scott was found with certainty.
They talked to him in May 2022 and assumed he was fine, Grier said.
“Then it took too long and his birthday was pushed back. I was trying to find other routes and look for missing persons reports. I look for any unidentified bodies that have been found. Then I thought, ‘Can I bother the police with another missing person case?’
Grier just didn’t feel comfortable and started the usual searches. At 9pm he decided to google “Scott Grier, Victoria, BC”.
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The first thing that came out was the 2020 report on missing persons. The second was an obituary with Scott’s name, dates of birth and death – May 16, 2022.
“Our hearts just went out,” Glen Grier said.
“We thought someone was pulling our leg or it was a hoax,” Michelle Grier said.
They called the Victoria Police, the Department for Social Development and Poverty Alleviation and the Coroner, but at this time they could not get through.
“We were restless. It was hard to sleep, hard to think,” said Michelle.
“There was a lot of denial before we knew it was actually true,” Glen said.
The next day, the coroner said they had Scott’s fingerprints and confirmed he died of a fentanyl overdose. He collapsed on the street and could not be revived.
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“Another sad story,” said Glen.
He and Michelle are still waiting to find out why they were not notified. Glen’s name and phone numbers were on the missing persons report, and he had received a call when Scott was found.
“Glen has been involved in every file his whole life. Whenever there was a problem or he ended up in the hospital, Scott gave Glen’s name and number to the doctors and said, ‘You can tell my dad anything,’” said Michelle. “We had the same phone number for 30 years. It’s all very frustrating.”
The Griers needed to find out where Scott is buried. Now they are trying to recover his ashes.
“The Ministry said that if we want to dig it, everything is possible,” said Michelle.
It costs $1,100 to recover the ashes.
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“I asked the lady from the ministry directly, ‘You knew his name, he was cremated, he was buried, why weren’t we notified?’ She didn’t comment on it,” Grier said.
While they wait for answers, the Griers also deal with the grief of Scott’s seven-year-old daughter, Octavia, who lives with them.
“Yesterday it was a beautiful day and the snow was soft, like ice cream, and she wrote ‘I miss my dad’ and drew some big hearts in the snow. It was very sweet,” Glen said.
They hope this does not happen to anyone again. People turned to her. A Victorian woman asked if she could put flowers on Scott’s grave, then sent them a picture.
“I didn’t realize how emotional I would be when I saw the marker – tears came to my eyes immediately. I was blown away by the kindness of this stranger and the sight of where he was buried — for now,” said Michelle.
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Victoria Police have begun a review of the file to see if officers could have taken additional steps, said Const. Terri Healy.
“This is a tragic event and our hearts go out to Scott’s family. No parent should have to learn of the death of their child in this way… We have reached out to the Grier family to express our condolences in their grief and to assure them that we are working active with our partners to ensure that this does not happen again. family.”
A spokesperson for the Department for Social Development and Poverty Alleviation said they received a referral from the Public Guardian and Trustee to manage the funeral arrangements for Scott Grier. The guardian and public trustee send references when they determine that a deceased person has no estate to administer. The reference did not identify any relatives.
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“When the next of kin are identified, the Department will follow up to review the final arrangements that will be made. However, the next of kin in Scott’s case were not known at the time,” said the spokesperson.
In BC, the Department of Social Development and Poverty Alleviation pays the necessary funeral expenses for people who die in the province if the deceased person’s estate does not have immediate funds to pay these expenses .
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